Trying to Control Your Partner: a Hindrance, Not a Help

What happens in a relationship when you try to bridge the gap between what you want and what you have? Control issues pop up. If you’ve ever found yourself saying or thinking things like:

“You should do/think/act like this”

“I’d be happy if only you’d...”

“You would be more _______ if you loved me”

“I need you to be more like so-and-so”

then chances are you are trying to control your partner. Trying to control your partner can lead to major issues for a couple. Let’s explore why some of us attempt to assert our control and why it ultimately is not healthy in your relationship!

You Can Be Right or You Can be in a Relationship

Have you had this moment with your partner: Partner A is yelling at Partner B, “We gotta go! We’re gonna be late!” Partner B is thinking, “It’s a party, it’s called being fashionably late” as Partner B takes time finishing up getting ready. Partner A is fuming about the lack of urgency Partner B is displaying. An argument ensues on the way to party. Whether you are Partner A or B you’re likely getting frustrated that your partner isn’t seeing your point of view.

Relationships & SexErinn WilliamsJuly 8, 2020ELEVATED life counselingassertiveness, anxiety, relationship, relationship baggage, sexless relationship, conflict in relationships, trusting relationships, terry real, RLT, relational life therapy, the new rules of marriage, losing strategies, couples therapy, couples fighting, couples communication, effective communication