Going out to eat is supposed to be fun. It’s a great way to get out of the house, socialize, try new cuisines, and eat without having to cook. For people without eating disorders, restaurants are exciting and relaxing. If you have an eating disorder, however, going to a restaurant can feel like torture.
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If you’ve ever been in therapy, you’ve likely heard the term self-compassion. Self-compassion in simple terms means kindness to yourself. It might look like forgiving yourself for your mistakes or going easy on yourself about your imperfections. Often, in an effort to help clients find compassion for themselves, I ask, “What would you say to a friend in your situation?” knowing that we are almost always kinder to others than we are to ourselves. For some, this gentle reminder is enough to change the pattern of harshness, but for those with a long history of self-deprecation, the prospect of treating yourself the way you would treat a loved one might not seem doable.
Read MoreEmotional wounds, or deep-seated psychological and emotional pain, can develop in a number of ways. Some wounds happen immediately, such as after witnessing the death of a friend. Others develop over time as a result of repeated experiences like parental neglect, unhealthy relationships, and systemic racism.
Emotional wounds impact the way we perceive and interact with the world around us, yet they can often go undetected, even by ourselves. Internalizing and externalizing behaviors often show up as a result of emotional pain but to the untrained eye can often be excused as personality traits like shyness or aggression. Instead of dismissing or shaming ourselves and others, we can learn to recognize the following four symptoms as alarm bells signaling the existence of pain and the need for healing.
Read MoreHow many times in the past month have you chosen to do something even if it meant putting up with uncomfortable feelings? Maybe you woke up at the sound of your morning alarm although staying in bed for another hour would have been much preferred. Maybe you worried about looking silly while wearing a mask to the grocery store during the COVID-19 crisis, but you wore one anyways. Or perhaps you chose to forgo watching your favorite Netflix show in order to write a paper or study for an upcoming exam.
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Eating disorder recovery is one of the most rewarding, yet difficult, journeys upon which a person can embark. As if it isn’t challenging enough, those in recovery must now navigate its waters while being stuck inside their homes in quarantine, preventing the spread of COVID-19, or Coronavirus. Eating disorders, like most other mental health issues, thrive in isolation. Throw in a dose of fear, restricted movement, and grocery store chaos, and you have what seems to be the perfect breeding ground for eating disorder thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. But what if mandated social distancing could be looked at as an opportunity to go further in recovery than ever before?
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